Chapter 1

Who is there, over the wide world, who has not, at one period or
another, in a more or less degree, felt the mysterious influences of
love?--Whoever thou art, then, courteous reader, who shalt, after the
lapse of years, turn over these papers, recall, I beseech you, to
recollection that noontide interval of dazzling brightness--contemplate
once more that beautiful image, which came, like an impersonization of
the abstract spirit of love, from divine regions, to meet you.

At that time, it was through her,--through her alone, that thou
seemed'st assured of thine own existence! Canst thou not yet remember,
how the rushing streams, the waving trees, and the balmy winds of
evening, spoke to thee, in articulate and intelligible accents, of her,
and of the prevailing passion which possessed thy whole heart and
soul?--Canst thou yet behold how the flowers unfolded their bright
beaming eyes, bearing to thine from her kisses and salutation?

Yet, suppose that she herself had actually come--that she vowed to be
thine, and thine only--to live for thee alone--then didst thou fold her
in thy embraces, and it seemed as if Heaven opened its eternal realms to
receive you--as if thou could'st raise thyself with her above all the
petty sorrows or enjoyments of this every-day and earthly sphere. Yet
scarcely hadst thou formed such hopes ere she was lost! The bland
illusion was broken. No longer could'st thou hear the music of her
celestial voice; and only the sorrowful complaints of the despairing and
forsaken lover sounded amid the desolate loneliness!

If then, reader, to me unknown!--if thou hast ever been persecuted by
such a destiny, join, then, and sympathize with the grief of the
penitent monk, who, recollecting still the sunny gleams of his youthful
attachment, weeps on his hard couch, and whose fearful groans
reverberate, in the stillness of night, through the gloomy aisles of the
convent!--But thou, too, in spirit to me related, doubtless wilt concur
in my belief, that it is not till _after death_, that the mysterious
gifts and enjoyments of this passion can be obtained and fulfilled! This
truth is, indeed, announced to us by many a hollow prophesying voice,
which rises on our ears from the immeasurable depths of eternity; and as
in those rites, celebrated by our earliest ancestors, (the children of
nature,) death appears also to us the high festival of love!

I have said before, that my leading object in these pages was rapid,
concise narrative, without any attempt at description. But of my
emotions on meeting Aurelia, that evening, in the palace, no words
could, however skilfully laboured, convey any adequate impression. I was
struck as if with a thundershock. My breast heaved--my heart beat
convulsively--and every pulse and vein throbbed almost audibly.

"To _her_!--to _her_!"--It seemed as if an over-powering impulse would
force me to thrust aside the contemptible mob of insipid worldlings--of
every-day flatterers, scarcely possessed of one rational idea, by whom
she was surrounded--to crush, like webs of gossamer, those despicable
barriers, and snatch her to my arms, in all the wild frenzy of
undisguised passion! Methought I could have exclaimed aloud--"What,
unhappy girl, dost thou strive against? With that supernatural power,
which has irresistibly and unalterably chained thee to me?--Am I not thy
fate, and art thou not indeed mine for ever?"

Yet notwithstanding these emotions, I contrived, far better than
formerly, at the Baron's castle, to conceal from the bystanders my
agitation. Besides, the eyes of all were directed to Aurelia; and thus,
in a circle of people, who to my concerns were perfectly indifferent, I
contrived to move about, without being particularly remarked or spoken
to, which to me would have been intolerable, as I could but see, hear,
and think of her alone.

Let no one insist that a truly beautiful girl appears to most advantage
in a homely household dress. On the contrary, the beauty of woman, like
that of flowers in a parterre, is then most attractive and irresistible
when they are arrayed in their fullest pomp and magnificence. Say,
then, oh lover! to whom I have before addressed myself, when thou for
the first time beholdest the empress of thy heart--who had before worn a
simple garb, now attired with splendour and gleaming, the _cynosure_ of
a brilliant party--did not a new and nameless rapture vibrate through
every nerve and vein? She would appear to you indeed so strange! but
this, joined to the knowledge that she was in reality _the same_,
heightened the charms by which thy soul was wholly subjected. What
unspeakable pleasure, if thou could'st, by stealth, seize and press her
hand in the crowd, and say to thyself, she, who is here the magnet of
all eyes, is mine by indissoluble bonds, and lives for me alone!

Thus I beheld Aurelia on that evening dressed with becoming splendour
for her first introduction at court. Then the spirit of evil once more
became powerful within me, and lifted up his internal voice, to which I
now bent a willing ear--"Seest thou not now, Medardus," it began, "how
thou triumph'st over all the conditional laws and limitations of this
life--how Destiny now submits herself to thy will, and only knots more
firmly the threads which thou thyself hadst spun?"

There were many other women at court who might well have passed for
beautiful, but before the dazzling charms of Aurelia, they faded away
into utter insignificance. A kind of inspiration now seemed to take
possession of the most insipid and common-place characters. Even the old
courtiers gave up their usual strain of unmeaning talk, and visibly
exerted themselves, in order to appear to the best advantage in the eyes
of the beautiful stranger.

Aurelia received all this homage with looks fixed on the ground, and
with deep blushes; but now, when the Prince assembled the elder
courtiers about himself, and many a handsome youth timidly and
respectfully drew near her, she began, by degrees, to lose her
embarrassment, and to seem more cheerful.

There was, in particular, a certain Major of the _garde d'honneur_, who
succeeded in attracting a good deal of her attention, so that she at
last appeared occupied with him in lively discourse. I knew this Major
to be a decided favourite of the female sex; with a fine ear, he could
catch even the very tone, sentiment, and voice of the person whom he
addressed, so that the deceived listener seemed to hear a miraculous
anticipation of her own thoughts--a chord struck in perfect unison. I
now stood not far from Aurelia, who appeared to take no notice of me.
Many times I was on the point of going up to her, but, as if bound by
iron fetters, I could not move from the spot on which I stood. The
bitterness of envy and jealousy possessed my heart. At last, as I
steadfastly gazed on Aurelia and her fortunate companion, methought that
the Major's features were changed into those of Victorin!

As if actuated by some demon, I wholly lost all self-possession. In a
convulsed tone of bitter scorn and mockery, I laughed aloud--"Ha, ha,
ha!--Thou _revenant_!--Thou cursed libertine!" cried I, "has thy bed
then, in the devil's abyss, been so downy, that, in frenzied passion,
thou darest aspire to the chosen paramour of the Monk?"

I know not if I actually uttered these words, but I heard myself laugh,
and started up as from a dream, when the old Court-Marshal, taking my
arm, gently inquired, "What makes you so merry, Mr Leonard?" An ice-cold
shuddering passed over my whole frame.

Were not these the identical words of the pious brother Cyrillus, when,
at the time of my investiture, he remarked my sinful laughter?--Scarcely
was I able to utter some incoherent nonsense in reply--I felt conscious
that Aurelia was no longer near to me, but did not venture to look up to
see what had become of her. Instinctively, I resolved to make my escape,
and ran with my utmost speed through the illuminated apartments.
Doubtless, my appearance was in the utmost degree disordered, for I
remarked how every one cleared the way for me as if seized with horror
and affright. At length, I arrived at the outer-door, and leapt headlong
rather than ran down the broad marble staircase.

Henceforward I completely avoided the court; for to see Aurelia again,
without betraying the mystery which it was my interest to conceal,
seemed to me impossible. Abandoned to my own reveries, I ran through the
fields and woods, thinking of her, and beholding her alone. My
conviction always became more certain that some mysterious destiny bound
up her fate indissolubly with mine, and that my pursuit of her, which
had many times appeared to me as an unpardonable crime, was but the
fulfilment of an eternal and unalterable decree.

Thus encouraging myself, I laughed at the danger which now threatened
me, if Aurelia should recognize in me the murderer of Hermogen! Besides,
this appeared to me very improbable; and, meanwhile, the attentions of
those fluttering youths who laboured to win for themselves the good
graces of her who was altogether and exclusively mine, filled me with
the utmost scorn and contempt for their endeavours.

"What," said I, "are to me these Counts, Freyherrs, Chamberlains, and
military officers, in their motley coats bedaubed with lace, and hung
with orders? What are they more than gaudy impertinent insects, which,
if they became troublesome, I could with one blow crush to
annihilation?"

Reflecting on the chapel adventure of the Cistertian Convent, it seemed
to me as if, robed in my capuchin tunic, I could step in among them with
Aurelia, habited like a bride, in my arms, and that this proud and
haughty Princess should be forced even to sanction the marriage, and
prepare the bridal festival for that conquering and triumphant monk,
whom she now so much despised. Labouring with such thoughts, I
frequently pronounced aloud, and unconsciously, the name of Aurelia;
and, as before in the Capuchin Convent, laughed and howled like a
madman!

But, ere long, this tempest was laid, and I began quietly to take
counsel with myself in what manner I was now to act. Thus I was one
morning gliding through the park, considering whether it would be
prudent for me to attend another evening party at court, which had been
announced to me, when some one touched me on the shoulder. It was the
physician.

To my great surprise, after the usual salutations, he looked steadfastly
in my face, took hold of my arm, and requested that I would allow him to
feel my pulse. "What's the meaning of all this?" cried I, with some
impatience.--"Nay," said he, "there is a sort of madness going about
here, that seizes all at once upon honest Christian people, and makes
them utter tremendous noises, though some will have it that the said
noises are nothing more than very immoderate laughter. At the same time,
this may be all a misconception; this devil of madness may be only a
slight fever, with heat in the blood; therefore I beg of you, sir,
allow me to feel your pulse."

"I assure you, sir," said I, "that I am well, and by no means understand
the drift of this discourse." The physician, however, had kept hold of
my arm, and now taking out his watch, counted my pulse with great
precision. His conduct, indeed, puzzled me completely, and I entreated
of him to explain himself.

"Do you not know, then, Mr Leonard," replied he, "that your behaviour
has lately brought the whole court into the utmost confusion and
consternation? Since that time, the lady of the upper Chamberlain has
been almost perpetually in hysterics; and the President of the
Consistorial Court has been obliged to put off hearing the weightiest
causes, because it was your pleasure to tramp with all your might upon
his gouty toes; so that, now confined to his arm-chair, he sits at home
roaring and cursing most notably. This happened when you were running
out of the hall, after you had laughed in such a demoniacal tone without
any perceptible reason, that all were seized with the utmost horror."

At that moment I thought of the Court-Marshal, and said that I indeed
recollected having laughed in that sudden manner, but that my conduct
surely could not have been attended by such consequences, as the Marshal
had only asked me, with great coolness, "Why I was so merry?"

"Nay, nay," answered the physician, "that will not prove much--The
Marshal is such a _homo impavidus_, that the very devil himself could
scarcely put him out of his way--He retained his ordinary placidity of
manner, but the Consistorial President, on the other hand, was
exceedingly disturbed in mind as well as in body, and maintained
seriously, that none but the devil could have laughed in such a
style.--But what is worst of all, our beautiful Aurelia was seized with
such excessive terror, that all the efforts of the family to quiet her
were in vain,--and she was soon obliged to retire, to the utter despair
of the company. At the moment too, when you, Mr Leonard, so charmingly
laughed, the Baroness Aurelia is said to have shrieked out the name,
"Hermogen!" Now what may be the meaning of all this?--You are generally
a pleasant, lively, and prudent man, Mr Leonard, and I cannot regret
having confided to you the story of Francesco, which, if all suggestions
be true, must be to you particularly intelligible and instructive!"

During this discourse, the physician had continued to hold my arm, and
to gaze steadfastly in my face. Tired of this restraint, I disengaged
myself with some roughness--and answered--"I really know not how to
interpret all this discourse of yours, sir; but I must confess, that
when I saw the beautiful Aurelia surrounded by that tribe of conceited
young gentry, a very bitter remembrance from my early life was called up
in my mind; and that, seized with a kind of angry scorn at the behaviour
of such empty-brained coxcombs, I forgot in whose presence I was, and
laughed aloud in a manner that would only have been warrantable when I
was alone. I am truly sorry that I have unintentionally brought about so
much mischief; but I have done penance on that score, having for some
time denied myself the pleasure of being at court. I hope that the
Prince's family and the Baroness Aurelia will excuse me."

"Alas! dear Mr Leonard," said the Doctor, "one is indeed subject to
strange attacks and varieties of mind, which we might yet easily resist,
if we were but pure in heart, and quiet in conscience."

"Who is there," said I vehemently, "on this earthly sphere, that may
boast of being so?"--The physician suddenly changed his looks and tone.
Mildly and seriously he said--"Mr Leonard, you appear to me to be really
and truly sick: your looks are pale and disordered--your eyes are sunk,
and gleam with a strange kind of fire--your pulse, too, is feverish, and
your voice sounds strangely.--Shall I prescribe something for you?"

"Poison!" answered I, in a kind of hollow whisper.--"Ho, ho," said the
physician, "does it stand thus with you?--Nay, nay, instead of poison,
rather the tranquillizing and sedative remedy of pleasant society, and
moderate dissipation. It may, however, be, that"--(hesitating)--"It is
wonderful indeed, but----"

"I must beg of you, sir," said I, now quite angry, "not to torment me in
that manner by your broken hints, but at once to speak out."

"Hold!" answered the Doctor. "Not so fast, Mr Leonard--yonder comes the
Princess--there are in this world the strangest delusions, and for my
part, I feel almost a conviction that people have here built up an
hypothesis which a few minutes' explanation will dissolve into nothing.
Yonder, as I said, comes the Princess with Aurelia.--Do you make use of
this accidental rencontre. Offer your own excuses for your behaviour.
Properly, indeed, your only crime is, that you have laughed--in an
extraordinary tone it is true, and rather inopportunely. But who can
help it, if people with weak nerves have on that occasion chosen to be
so absurdly terrified?--Adieu!"

The physician started away with that vivacity which to him was
peculiar.--The Princess and Aurelia were coming down the walk to meet
me. I trembled; but with my whole strength laboured to regain composure,
for after the mysterious discourse of the physician, I felt that it was
my duty on the instant to defend my character. Resolutely, therefore, I
went forward to meet them; but no sooner had Aurelia fixed her eyes upon
me than she became deadly pale, and to my utter astonishment, with a
suppressed scream, she fell down in a fainting fit, to the ground. I
wished to assist her, but with looks of aversion and horror, the
Princess then motioned me away, at the same time calling loudly for
help!